The quote, “Be the kind of woman who fixes another woman’s crown without telling the world it was crooked,” resonates deeply with me, embodying the essence of empowerment, kindness, and genuine support for others. It speaks of the grace and strength found in lifting one another. But what happens when you find lifting yourself challenging or your crown feels askew? That is where my journey of discovering the unconditional love of God begins, eventually leading to the desire to help others find their worth in Him.
I vividly remember being eighteen years old and stepping onto the college campus with dreams and talents in tow. Dance, singing, drama, spoken word—I had it all. I auditioned for various college clubs, confident that my skills would secure my place and that I would head to university-level competitions. I was wrong! The results revealed no successful auditions. I felt worthless without tangible achievements or reaching the standards I had set for myself. Thoughtless personal remarks from seniors shattered my confidence, and in an instant, my world crumbled. Their words, coupled with my negative thoughts, became the blueprints of my self-perception. The place where I thought my dreams would come true became the very place of failure as low self-esteem sneaked its way into my college experience.
During my struggles, two women visiting the campus introduced me to Jesus using a small yellow booklet. I was confused, doubting if God truly loved me and if I was worthy. How could God love me when I didn’t even love myself? Seeking answers, I attended Bible studies and began reading scriptures attentively for the first time. God’s narrative about who I was began to change my negative self-perception. Changing the deeply ingrained thoughts in my mind took intentional effort and time. After four months of seeking, in a quiet classroom corner, moved by His love and acknowledging that ‘I am fearfully and wonderfully made,’ I surrendered, becoming a believer through prayer.
Standing on the other side of transformation, I appreciated the quiet and patient support of the two women who walked alongside me during that challenging period. Their encouragement played a crucial role in discovering purpose, identity, and worth. I wanted to extend the same support and empowerment to others, so I became a student leader on my campus, sharing the Gospel with fellow students, listening to their stories, and learning together. Later, I would find out that God was giving me hands-on experience to continue speaking into the lives of others. I received His calling when I didn’t even think I was capable of serving full-time. But He was clear. He wanted me to serve, and I said yes thirty-two years ago.
It is true that personal struggles and challenges can evolve into deep-seated passions and priorities. I am passionate about inspiring and empowering women, encouraging them to know God, recognize their inherent worth, and embrace their true identity and purpose in Him. Whether interacting with young women on campus, in the corporate world, or during conversations and coaching sessions with female colleagues, I praise God for the privilege of standing alongside other women, offering encouragement and support.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
Psalm 139:14
P.S.
For those curious about how I fared in college after I started following Christ… Well, the external challenges remained much the same since I wasn’t part of any club. However, I discovered relief and joy after letting go of the pressure of meeting impossible standards I had set for myself. God showed me that He wanted me to glorify Him and not seek validation from others. He wanted me to trust Him, enjoy the talents He had given me, and use them for His glory. I set realistic goals and plans, trusting God to help me achieve things I could not do on my own. I chose to believe in God’s words instead of dwelling on hurtful comments, and I decided to forgive the seniors. I made many new friends, who I now know were handpicked by God. United by our shared quirks, we formed a lively and diverse group. Surprisingly, my friends from different faiths willingly listened to my testimony, with some finding their way to Christ. God gave me many opportunities to showcase my talents in fun and unique ways. By my final year in college, I came to be known as the girl who loved God, sang with passion, expressed creativity, and had the privilege of presenting a research-level paper to the English department faculty at the central University.
11 thoughts on “Self-Doubt to Empowering Others”
Loved reading your story, Romila! And I love the picture of you (or anyone!)straightening another woman’s crown without telling the world it was crooked.
This is beautifully written – thanks so much for sharing the story. I love the ‘crown fixing’ quote – wish more guys would learn the same skill!
Thank you for the encouragement, Paul!
Thank you Didi for sharing your story and it is so encouraging.
Thank you, Justin, for your kind words of encouragement!
It is amazing when we find, and rest in our identity in Christ. Thank you, Romila.
Yes, so amazing!… Thank you, Adantsi!
This is a powerful story that needs to be told. Thanks for your vulnerability and the lessons God gave you. It is an encouragement to so many women around you and the world of a transformed life in Christ.
Thank you for your kind and encouraging words!
Romila, it is so fun to hear more of your back story. Thank you for your courage to vulnerably share about the process the Lord has you on.
Thank you, Steve, for your encouraging words!